Thursday, February 19, 2009

Tu Feo Chango (Not For the Legally Blind)

Big words make us look smart. Big words make things automatically fact. Just look at the newspaper for example! We see something in big letters and we go, "GASP! HOLY COW! WOW! DAFT! THAT'S A SHAME! etc."
Yet small words we ignore as if they aren't there. In all reality these small words are what's important. We like to call this the "fine print". So now I'll show you an example of mad consumerism and the idiocy of the human population.

High speed interent is free for first half hour, regular costs will reach $99.95 per month. People who do in fact read this are not legally classified as genuises. One free piece of popcorn per person. No cash in rebate. Offer ends 2/20/09.

Those little small words are also talked in hurried/hushed tones. I wonder why that is? Do those people who read the "fine print" in commercials have to go to school for that? Maybe they were born with it or maybe it's Maybeline.

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Now A Word From Our Sponsors

Every time you read this blog a koala hiccups. Have pity on those poor marsupials and stop reading this blog! Well since I'm writing I better write something worthwhile. Have you ever noticed hair? Hair is a dead substance that hangs on top of our heads. Sometimes we find this lifeless material attractive and while it's just dangling there we have the imagination to try to fix it into different shapes and forms. This applies to all of us, well, except if you're bald. That brings to mind another delema. Lately I've noticed how young men are starting to shave their head when their hair starts to thin. Same goes for aging men too! It's some new style or something. They just give up on hair. Bloomin' pity. Well this was a waste. Proves that I should quit blogging. GAH! CURSE YOU SAN DIEGO!